Chronicles of Leeland : The Iron, the b*tch and the cardrobe

Tuesday has passed into Wednesday. Cant remember what Wednesdays child was, but if I'm anything to go by today, wednesdays child is frustrated, annoyed and fed up. Normal state for me then!

This morning I was up on time due to conference call with our bods in Singapore. Following that I began an epic struggle with a new shirt, an iron, an ironing board and general getting ready exercise. Firstly there began with the opening of the shirt. Brand new shirt purchased at the weekend from Debenhams made by "Osbourne". Gorgeous material, in a nice shade of pink with a very very tiny white check pattern to it. Complimented very nicely today with a black tie.

Osbourne, whilst being fine shirt makers using excellent materials, appear to use mad blind "stuffers" for their packing. Upon removing the shirt from its package, only the front and part of back was relatively crease free. The arms, sides and the rest of the shirt closely resembled a map of tributaries and rivers of the Amazon jungle. So, had to resort to ironing.

I'd like to complain about the design of ironing boards. Firstly, why are they never quiet when released? Secondly why, when released do they always hit or catch something, no matter how careful you are? So after a fierce epic battle (complete with star trek fight music, picture some guy fighting an ironing board in the middle of a small stone circle!) I finally managed to assemble said ironing board.

Now we move onto the iron itself. Never, have I encountered an iron that actually works. I've used many irons over the years, some of which I purchased at both great, and not so great expense. There have been feeble travel irons in hotels, massively expensive complicated ones which allegedly are able to iron things just by showing it to the clothes, and average irons in other peoples homes. All irons in the world do one or several of the following:

1. Leak water the whole time like an incontinent pensioner
2. Switch themselves off half way through attacking a violent crease
3. Somehow create new creases in the wake of old ones
4. Fail to remove any creases but make the item of clothing extremely hot
5. Drop bits of limescale all over the clothes and then sear them into the fabric creating unpleasant stains
6. Not actually get rid of any creases whatsoever, or generate enough steam to do anything with the clothing.
7. Gets so hot it removes the creases on one side of the clothing, only to iron in brand new ones on the other side (particularly when dealing with shirt sleeves!).

Nemesis!

Somebody design an iron that works please.. im developing a terrible nervous tick over them from seeing new creases appear in something which had already taken an age to iron.

So, after about 20 minutes of ironing the same shirt I finally get ready, only to discover I cant find my wallet, or my swipe card for the offices, or my overcoat. Rumage around everywhere and then realise I've left it in the car. Opening the car I find a jumper I've been looking for, a pair of jeans, and some socks. I really need to get moved soon.. life in bags has turned to life in bags, in a car.

My drive into work was okay. I pulled over briefly and took some pretty photos of the landscape near the village..

The b*tch in the title refers to the fact that im fast losing my temper with a number of people here who are making my life a misery by not doing their jobs properly. This one person in particular has failled to manage a project properly, and due to increasing problems im losing a lot of vital resources I needed to meet deadlines to some f*ck up. not a happy bunny.